We have to talk about the elephant in the reception - Wedding Speeches

Let’s be real, public speaking isn’t for everyone. Some people even consider it a fear, especially when it occurs in front of an audience of 100 or more. Stage fright is a real thing. However, when a loved one asks you to speak at their wedding or it’s something you want to contribute to their big day, I have some tips, tricks, and please dear lord listen-ups for you.

Let’s go back to basics.

You really want to start with the basics we learn in English. The best way to start is by writing down your thoughts for the speech. I think you should actually do this with pen and paper. There’s less distraction when you are physically writing it out. Here are some things to keep in mind while you write it out: Know your audience, have a goal, and think of an example. Once you have your thoughts written down, you should type them out on the computer in the form of an introduction first, body second, and conclusion third. Keep in mind that if you are terrible with grammar like I am, there are programs out there you can use to help you out in that department (yes, I use them, and I have improved my grammar because of them!).

I happened to grow up with a brother and father who are skilled at giving speeches. They are both very charismatic and definitely don’t have stage fright. There are several things they do to prepare for speeches that make giving the speeches that much easier. They follow through with the above directions. Then they either write the speech out (which is a fantastic form of memorization) or print their speech, and they read it over and over again. Once they have read it enough, they feel confident practicing that speech in front of trusted family and friends. They receive feedback, make changes, and then do it all over again. Eventually, when they get up to make their speeches, it’s second nature, and they don’t even notice the people standing around them.

Lastly, my personal advice to you as a wedding photographer and wedding planner is this:

-Keep the speech under two minutes - I was at a wedding recently where the father giving a speech almost made it painful to be in the room; he definitely didn’t practice, and had such long pauses in between his sentences that it was confusing. He was probably up there for 15 minutes.

-Print the speech to have in front of you (but put it on your phone too, just in case). - I can’t tell you the number of times someone has their speech on their phone and it goes off, or it sends them a notification that completely ruins the flow.

-Practice over and over. - This is key. Even if you are only practicing with yourself in the mirror.

Some of my favorite memories from my own wedding day were of my brother's and father’s speeches. They printed them, so I got to keep them in my scrapbook. My dad got the entire room involved in mine and connected me and my husband beautifully.

Good luck with your next speech!

Talk soon,

Kate